We'd been on a few dates, but it was the first time I'd seen his apartment. What A Tool"One night I hooked up with a guy I met online. Here, six women let us in on their most disturbing, humiliating, and sometimes funny (in retrospect, of course) stories of digital dating gone terribly wrong.
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He had tools and screws and pieces of wood lying around everywhere. The next morning at 5 am, I woke up with a bright light shining in my face.
It turns out he had rigged up this system with a light on a timer to simulate the rising of the sun.
I later found out he also had a makeshift washing machine in his bathtub.
I guess it was cool, but I felt like I was going out with that little inventor kid, Data, from The Goonies." "I'd been on two dates with this guy when he started telling me how much he wanted to make me dinner on our third date. Well, the whole next week he sent me pictures of all the meals he'd prepared for himself. I nearly got diarrhea just from looking at the pics. I feel bad, but I was just worried I'd get stuck all the way out in his neighborhood without a bottle of Imodium A-D." "I got puked on. It was this dude, Lorenzo, who was a real tough guy from Queens.
There was one with a steak that had a grayish/purple glisten to it, and another with spaghetti and garlic sprinkled on Wonder Bread. He insisted we do shots, and he wasn't much of a conversationalist, so I figured it was a pretty good idea.
We're going shot for shot when all of a sudden he gets this weird expression on his face.
He looks down and vomits all over the foot of the bar. I really did'’t think we'd exchange that type of bodily fluid on the first date.” Which One Of Us Has PMS? Yes, I realize now that's never a good idea, but that year I just wanted to do something.
We met up at a restaurant and the guy was really cute, so everything seemed to be in order.
Then we sat down and he started looking around the restaurant at all the women with roses and bouquets of flowers.
He began telling me how much he loves freshly cut flowers, and he was sad he didn't get any that year.
Then he fell into a weird funk and became moody the rest of the meal. I quickly imagined a life together where I'd have to spoon him and tell him how beautiful he looked.